17 on the 17th!

before the clock striked 12, i was at the hospital.

its quite ironic when everyone wishes me HAPPY birthday when i saw my grandma at the CCU, stuck with tubes, unconcious and all. but no, i'm not being ungrateful, i don't feel sad.

we rushed there after recieving a call that she was in a critical condition. thank goodness it was a false alarm. but even so, watching my grandma in such a poor state put me appalled.

yet still, she had colour and was plump. i think i've never seen her so beautiful before.

haha. so a sister from church told us that even though a weak patient was unconcious, she could hear us. from a few days back when she couldn't hear us and all, i was sceptical.

leaning forward, i said in her ear: " Popo, can you hear me?" unnecessary to ask, but how to start right.

" Popo, i...." my throat caught, and i had a loss for words. and all i could say was just, " Po, i love you. i love you, i love you."

my mum and my sister joined in. with the choruses of "i love you"s, my sister said in awe," Ma, she's tearing."

and true enough, there was one sliding from one eye down to her cheek.

and obviously, we cried and continued to talk to her.

it was a night of conflict in me, what with looking at my grandma and feeling tears well up; and continuing to recieve text messages and feeling so appreciated. guys, THANK YOU, you've managed to put a smile on my face in this tough time i'm having here.

but now, not so tough. i know that she is going to heaven, i know i will see her in 60 to 70 years time? but eventually, i will lah. (:

i really thank God for everything currently, seriously. even if my grandma has to go away, it has impacted, bonded, superglued, restored, reminded, and refreshed so many things.

and today, Popo is getting much better with the help of meds. she is currently waiting for her eldest daughter to come back from NZ. and i just sang her Christain hymns. and checked for her reaction.

when i sang a chinese hymn, she opened one eyelid halfway. but when i sang an english one, she went right back to sleep. :)

oh popo, popo.

and for the outing that xinwei (credits!) planned, i just wanna thank again all who attended. i love all you guys!!! it was the best!